I have Problems.. you have problems ..we all have problems

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 Now please keep reading before you get any ideas about how my personality is.  You are all thinking, she's one of "those" people who see the good in people.  She's one of "those" people who try to be positive all the time.  My response, I use to be like that, and I am trying to become like that again.
  Being on a mission, I've come to realize, that each missionary as their own unique opportunity to grow, and to be pulled and stretched.  Each missionary goes through different phases on a mission. For me, I have gone through these different phases.

MTC Life: this is the moment when a missionary realizes what he or she signed up for.  This is the moment when missionaries either dive head on or are very slow to act in the work. This is the moment when they must learn how to study.  They must learn how be with someone for literally 24 hours of the day.  They must learn how to develop christlike attributes daily.

Training: This is when a missionary  absolutely loves the person they are with for approximatly 12 weeks. Their trainer shows them the ropes of missionary life. They show them through example, dedication, and work ethic. Most missionaries love their trainers.

Greenie busting: This is when a missionary must learn to work with someone different then their trainer.  This can sometimes be very difficult, and hard for most missionaries because both missionaries are very different people.

Learning how to let go: This is the stage I am at right now.  This is when a missionary must give everything they have to the lord, and to the work. They must give up their will(in a sense) to trust in the lord completely.  This has been something very difficult for me.  It has been very hard to put trust in the lord with all the trials he has sent me while on my mission. I have however found that  I don't have to understand why everything happens.. or when it happens. I just have to have faith in my Heavenly Father that he knows what he's doing.  Easier said then done most of the time. I do have faith that it works though:)  I do have faith that he is helping me to see the good among st the bad, the joy among the heartache, the happiness among the saddness.  I have that faith.

It doesn't seem very fair, does it?

 We sometimes have our own idea of how things are suppose to happen, and when it doesn't happen the way we want, we become frustrated with God and his timing.  I know I have been so frustrated at Heavenly Father, and then it makes me feel bad because I should have more faith in his timing. However, its hard to have faith in things we don't understand fully.       But I know that through my experiences I have seen how Heavenly Father truly loves me. I have seen it through his tender mercies to me.  Those experiences have become dear to my heart and very sacred to me because it has shown me that he cares and he wants to aide me in all my endeavors.  I want to share a post from facebook I posted right before I left on my mission.  It says: 

"It just doesn't seem fair. When you make the best choices for yourself.. the devil always fights back. He doesn't give up at giving you difficulty, and almost near impossible feats to push through. He pushes you. He could rip your heart out if he wanted to. 
But God prevails with the everlasting gospel. I now know why I chose to serve a mission. To get every last person I can to go through the temple. And go through it worthily." 

That statement is my personal mission statement. Its there to help remind me about my purpose as a missionary, and my purpose as a daughter of God.  Its also why he gives us simple moments, or simple reminders of our purpose on this earth, and that's what I call God's tender mercies. Those things are there to help aide us when you cant feel strong, or are feeling discouraged.  Heavenly Father is here. He wont leave.  NO MATTER HOW FRUSTRATED YOU ARE! He wont leave because he loves you dearly. Period.  When you come to realize this, you forget your problems, and come unto his son Jesus Christ! That's what I am doing as a missionary. Helping others realize this powerful statement:)  

<3 Families can be together Forever <3

A simple Decision

 As I sit here my mind and heart are struggling with what to write that can help those who need the message of the gospel. The one thing that keeps coming back to me is a simple example I saw yesterday. My companion and I were out tracking in a near by trailer park. The first door we knocked on was an old woman. As she opened the door a rush of smoke came outside and greeted us.  We both felt as though we could hardly breath with the thickness of her cigarettes in the home. We continued talking with this woman and soon found out that it was her birthday. We wished her happy birthday and we were on our way. My companion looked at me and said, " Hermana Allen, I feel like we should buy her flowers, since its her birthday."  I looked at her and was thinking, why? We hardly know this woman, why do you feel that way?  She responded with, "tracking isn't about knocking, and knocking on as many doors that you can find. Its about finding opportunities to serve when you least expect them. This is one of those opportunities hermana."    I was very shocked and confused at first. But we went and  bought some simple flowers and a small card and we wrote, " We thought that every girl deserves flowers on her birthday, no matter her age!"
 We went back to the home within 20 minutes of first being there, and knocked once again. She looked happily surprised as my companion handed her the flowers saying, " Happy birthday!!"
 
Now I think about the great example that was. Finding time, out of our way, not planned and doing service. Simple flowers. A simple decision. A simple choice brought someone a great deal of happiness.  Please find some time this week, out of your way to do a simple service.  You will feel a great deal of love for your fellow man.

Good things to come

I have always loved the talk that Elder Holland wrote about having
 faith in the past general conference. In it he talked about how its hard to
 have faith in things we cant see or understand completely. How even if we
do not understand every detail, we can be alright. We have to wait for guidance
 and knowledge to come with age,experience, and time.  With these three factors
 we can be more then just fine.  We can be eternally happy and grateful for those
experiences that make us fall down to our knees in tears.  Part of having faith is
waiting for more knowledge to come.  And I can promise each of you who
 read this post, Heavenly Father will help you grow,learn and become
 stronger through each of your trials.  In the end, you will see how
important that trial was for you to experience how faith works.
 To this end, I say that God Lives. His Son Jesus Christ
atoned for each of our trials, and I know that they both love you all so dearly.

The Power of the BREAD!:)

Today is a Monday. Mondays have become my favorite days on the week. Partly because Sunday is the day before and Pday is right after. Sundays have always helped me fill renewed and ready for the next week, and I love it!  In sacrament we were waiting for the bread to blessed and the little deacons realized that someone forgot to bring the bread. The whole congregation noticed! Suddenly my heart dropped! I never realized how much I wanted to take the sacrament until that moment.  How much I really need it each and every week, until the thought came to my mind, that someone forgot the bread! How terrible! I soon realized that one of the young boys went and got some. My heart immediately felt relived. I would be just fine:)! haha
   This simple yet powerful story has helped renew my faith in the power of the atonement. The power in the sacrament that I am so blessed to partake of every week, is such a strength to me.  The knowledge that I a person of many sins, many silly mistakes, and many burdens can feel strong and powerful every week. EVERY WEEK I can FEEL STRONG! This is because my father in heaven loves me so much, that he gave me a way to return to him. That way is through his son JESUS CHRIST!  The Atonement can be a strength to all who receive his word and act upon it. :)

Happy News:)

This post will be very short seeing as I am short on time. However I wish to express my gratitude for my Heavenly Father in heaven! He shapes each of us to be better and even more better! This gospel is here to stay and I know it! May you all remember his hand in each of your lives. :) Have a wonderful day!!

Merely a boy..

Through this past month I have been discovering a lot about myself within and without the gospel. I've noticed that when I think I know something, it isn't actually that I know it but its because I have Heavenly Father's guidance in my life. For example, in my mission prep. class we had an assignment to go out and teach at least 3 different people about the restoration of the gospel, and the first vision. I have been sick this past weekend, so it made it very hard for me to find the motivation to want to teach when I didn't feel 100% great. However, it was an assignment for a grade. I didn't have time to prepare with my companion so we went into the lesson hoping that what was meant to be said would be said. As  I talked about the purpose of Joseph Smith I shocked myself greatly. How did I feel so strongly in my conviction, and feel like I knew absolutely nothing about the importance of the church history dates. As we continued teaching the lesson we went on to talk about why Joseph was searching for truth in a church. He went on to discover a verse in James 1:5
"If any of you lack ^bwisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him."
Now this scripture is very much over used within the church. And for good reason too! How can it be that a 14 year old, of minor education could have the audacity or the knowledge to seek out the truth for himself and not have a great calling placed before him. I am always truly impressed and amazed by his maturity to seek the truth. I'm pretty sure not very many 14 years would actually do the work necessary to find the answer.. by the right means. As time continued he was prompted to go into a grove of tree's to seek solitude away from the disruption of his busy religious world. As he prayed, he

" saw a pillar of ^clight exactly over my head, above the brightness of the ^dsun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me.

 17 It no sooner appeared than I found myself ^adelivered from the enemy which held me bound. When the light rested upon me I^bsaw two ^cPersonages, whose brightness and ^dglory defy all description, ^estanding above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My ^fBeloved ^gSon. Hear Him!"

Joseph Smith History 1:16-17

Now this just blows my mind. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ wanted the church to be restored. No if ands or buts. They have a marvelous purpose set out for Joseph Smith and restoring the gospel. Just as we each have a marvelous purpose set out before each of us, as family,friends, mothers,fathers,spouses, and even as missionaries. The church is true beyond a shadow of doubt. I know it. I love it. And I live it!