Merely a boy..

Through this past month I have been discovering a lot about myself within and without the gospel. I've noticed that when I think I know something, it isn't actually that I know it but its because I have Heavenly Father's guidance in my life. For example, in my mission prep. class we had an assignment to go out and teach at least 3 different people about the restoration of the gospel, and the first vision. I have been sick this past weekend, so it made it very hard for me to find the motivation to want to teach when I didn't feel 100% great. However, it was an assignment for a grade. I didn't have time to prepare with my companion so we went into the lesson hoping that what was meant to be said would be said. As  I talked about the purpose of Joseph Smith I shocked myself greatly. How did I feel so strongly in my conviction, and feel like I knew absolutely nothing about the importance of the church history dates. As we continued teaching the lesson we went on to talk about why Joseph was searching for truth in a church. He went on to discover a verse in James 1:5
"If any of you lack ^bwisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him."
Now this scripture is very much over used within the church. And for good reason too! How can it be that a 14 year old, of minor education could have the audacity or the knowledge to seek out the truth for himself and not have a great calling placed before him. I am always truly impressed and amazed by his maturity to seek the truth. I'm pretty sure not very many 14 years would actually do the work necessary to find the answer.. by the right means. As time continued he was prompted to go into a grove of tree's to seek solitude away from the disruption of his busy religious world. As he prayed, he

" saw a pillar of ^clight exactly over my head, above the brightness of the ^dsun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me.

 17 It no sooner appeared than I found myself ^adelivered from the enemy which held me bound. When the light rested upon me I^bsaw two ^cPersonages, whose brightness and ^dglory defy all description, ^estanding above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My ^fBeloved ^gSon. Hear Him!"

Joseph Smith History 1:16-17

Now this just blows my mind. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ wanted the church to be restored. No if ands or buts. They have a marvelous purpose set out for Joseph Smith and restoring the gospel. Just as we each have a marvelous purpose set out before each of us, as family,friends, mothers,fathers,spouses, and even as missionaries. The church is true beyond a shadow of doubt. I know it. I love it. And I live it! 

Turmoil- Tender Urgency Requires More Open-nses In Love

I begin writing the day before Christmas eve, because I know I will be busy with the festivities tomorrow. I write during a time  of confusing trials and a time of wonderful blessings. This past week home, a lot of things have happened.
1. A High school student brought a gun, to my old high school, where my mother, and sister were. Nothing happened because of the amazing faculty.
2. A friend of mine decided to take her own life at the age of 18.
Needless to say there have been many things going on that are scary, and very painful. All I can say is Life can be very upsetting and difficult sometimes. It can be down right hard, and terrible to overcome.
This is what makes me so very grateful for the church's influence in my life. Had I not the knowledge of eternity, and the protection that the priesthood gives I would be at an utter lost of words right now. It would be so much harder to want to try and push through. There is so much deceit and hurt in the world today, that we sometimes forget the blessings that Heavenly Father has given us. I know for myself I have the blessing of a wonderful family who supports me and wants me to succedde and wants me to continue preparing for a mission. I sometimes wonder if they want me to go just so they can get blessings for themselves.. How jealous! ;) I also have been blessed with dear friends who support me. Point of this post.. Life can be hard and full of turmoil but I know without a shadow of a doubt that has long as you put the lifestyle of the gospel at the fore front on your life you will be blessed, if not now, in the life to come.

Dear God, Help me to stand out...even if it means Standing Alone.

"Self-Reliance is the acceptance and recognition of the fact that each individual is responsible for their own financial,spiritual, and political well-being. As a principle,self-reliance is closely related to the principles of agency and accountability, and opposite to the idea that someone else is responsible for a person's well being. It is the recognition that one can only reap where they have sown and that the spirit of entitlement is the spirit of selfishness and pride." -American Foundations-Bro. Eric Waltz

Marion G. Romney has said: "Let us work for what we need. Let us be self-reliant and independent. Salvation can be obtained on no other principle. Salvation is an individual matter, and we must work out our own salvation in temporal as well as in spiritual things."

As my first semester of growth is coming to an end, I ponder and realize how wonderful it has been for me. Although, It was very hard for me to leave the comfort of my home, and live somewhere much much colder then I thought, and be alone doing it, I have grown. I do not have that same reliance on my family as I was had. I know they support me and want the best for me, but I've learned how to make decisions without their aid in my life. It has helped me learn to rely on myself as well as my Heavenly Father. Even though I may have felt alone this semester, I never really was because I always had prayer. And prayer is a pretty powerful thing, let me tell you!!  I put these two quotes on this to reference back to because I find that in order to be completely self reliant, one has to have a reliance on prayer.  To be self-reliant, is to be alone, as characterized by our society. I however have found myself to be much more reliant when I rely on my relationship with my Heavenly Father. It is so important to have a relationship with God, on so many levels, as well as knowing Jesus Christ. They true-ly want the absolute best for you, just as your family does! So don't kick them out when they come knocking, and do not, I repeat, do not be afraid to open your heart to their guidance in your life. They love you, and want you to succeed in all your endeavors you try! :)  Headed Home for the Holidays, So may you all travel home in safety and have no harm come to you :) Happy Weekend!

Eye of the Tiger.. Or Eye of the Mission

 Once a choice has been made, sometimes it is super easy to stick with it, and other times when it is the Lord's errand, it becomes very easy to want to push it aside. I know that my choice to serve a mission is the right choice. There are too many connections for me not to. I just find it very funny that has soon as I started preparing myself other things have come up. Things that I never ever thought would be a problem for me. Satin is trying so very hard to want to get me off the path, which I know to be true, as well as for so many other missionaries out there who are preparing to serve. It can be a big problem, if I don't keep my eyes open. I am starting to prepare myself in small ways.. by texting less, staying away from face book, and when on my computer, looking up things that have to pertain to the gospel.
   I just have to continue to perserver and have my goal in sight :)  As I write this, the song , " Eye of the Tiger" came on, on my iTunes. How Ironic.. I have the sight of a mission and  I have my Eye on the Mission :)  So everyone, watch out for my eye, it has the power to make you want to be better... ;) haha!

Biggest Enemy or Biggest Supporter ?

This weekend has been one of realization,disappointment, and accomplishment. As I have to come find out, there are good people on this earth, there are misunderstand people, there are happy and kind people. But no matter who these people are, or where they have come from they are sons and daughters of a royal birth. Some are much easier to love..  Some are easier to get along with. Some you butt heads with like no tomorrow. Through every struggle with these different relationships I've come to see that as long as you have that eternal perspective in your heart nothing else should deter your objectives.
    I became so mad at a friend that I was willing to disrupt the spirit during church. After doing so, I felt justified by me doing so. As I walked home enraged I was thinking I had every right to be upset. After all, I never get mad, so I had the right to every now and then. I came home to find my mother had posted some new family pictures.. I smiled knowing that no matter where I was I knew that my family supports me and loves me. But as I continued to look and ponder, I remembered times where I was mad at my siblings or even my parents.. and some how I always seemed to come through. This really helped change my mind frame..
   I decided to change my attitude and try to be a much better person then I was acting. As I did so things began to work better.. more smoothly, more easy.  By the end of Sunday night, I was happy again, and no longer agitated with my friend, or myself. After talking with this friend, things began to be shaped back into the way they were. Things always do have a way of working themselves out.
 I think this experience helped me to be able to stand my own ground.. but also humbled me to know  its okay to not be stubborn. I know in my mission I will have so many different people that will be an influence in my life and it is up to me to say more generous and thoughtful things, then hurtful ones, even when I feel I may be right in my own way. This weekend was an interesting one for sure... Happy Monday everyone!

Just the Beginning..

This morning I put on my warm coat, warm ear head band, and walked out the front door. As I opened the main door to the complex, the brisk wind, sent a shock to my face, and sent me running back into the warm building. I thought for a moment, " do I really need to go to class today..?? wouldn't the professor understand that I had to walk in 30* weather!! Wouldn't he be alright if I made the assignment up?" I immediately felt disappointed in myself..  I mean come on Camille!! I am a Wyoming girl!! Cold wind is my middle name!! I Took a deep breath of warm air and pushed through the terrible freezing, cold, and bitter wind. And to my surprise I actually made it to campus without losing a toe, or an ear...  More than anything I felt a sense of accomplishment. Heck yes, I just conquered the Idaho morning Freeze!!
     Now the best way I can link this experience to Mission preparation is through having the Lord on my side. As much as I prepare myself through having the armor of God: scripture study, and prayers I will have have the courage and faith to push through. This means I cant allow myself to become so scared by the wind and the bitter cold that I stay inside. I have to push through, because I have the confidence in myself, as well as the faith in my Heavenly Father to share the gospel. Once again, I have been so blessed... and cannot wait to get all my papers in!!
* Papers officially Started Yesterday :) :) :)

Friendship comes in lots of ways

Today I was reminded of what good friendship, and christlike love really is. As I began to finish my homework prior to finals week, I realized that friendship comes in ways unexpected sometimes. For example, a friend allowed me to come over and watch a movie for a class, on her computer, on her netflix account prior to her going on a date. Now I just thought she was being a thoughtful person, but once there, she gladly exclaimed, " You must help me pick out an outfit, and would you do my hair??" So we sat and watched the movie together, as I helped her get all glamified for a date, and I hope that it goes well tonight!! :)
    In a talk given by Thomas S. Monson, he clearly states what matters most. And that thing is surrounding yourself with people who you think are important and who you value. It is  never too late to send a short note to a friend, or call your parents to just say hello. I believe that those things help mold anyone into a better human being. These actions help people see the light of Christ through you. How important that really is and no one will ever know until they themsleves receive this kindness. How it gladdens ones heart. :) Life is way too short to be continually gropping and whinning about yourself. Get out there and do something for someone else!! Write a sweet stickie note and put on the fridge for a spouse, or son or daughter. Send a text to someone you haven't heard from recently..

Be a good person and reach out to others.. as much as you feel you need it, they need it ten times more.

What Matters Most

<3 <3 <3